Today is the last Sunday of 2012. It's the last day of NFL football for 2012. And possibly 2012 will be the last year that we will be a family of four. We are still waiting for our approval from the Philippines ICAB (Inter-Country Adoption Board). It has been over 5 weeks since our last bit of required information was provided to the Philippines. Typically it is supposed to take about 3 weeks to receive back a decision but as everything has been, there seems to be delays (holidays, training and a Typhoon have gotten in the way).
However, we have received some good news that a sibling group of 3 (1 boy & 2 girls) that we have inquired upon every month since October is available and has been put on hold for our agency. We have received about 40 pages of paperwork - medicals, psychologicals, family history, education standardized test results and progress reports. A lot of information to review, a lot of stuff to learn and a lot of things to think about. After lots of review, various conversations, lots of "what if" scenarios and many "how would we" discussions we responded to our agency with affirmation that we desired to pursue adoption of this sibling group.
The next step? Well we had to write a letter to the board expressing our desire for these children and why we feel they would be a good match for our family. After asking what should be in such a letter and getting back a response of "it's not a big deal" and "just write it from your heart", I sat down to put my thoughts & feelings onto paper. The words seems to flow naturally and I hit send with more enthusiasm than I've had in weeks. Of course it was a short lived excitement because the next day, the agency sent me back a message asking for the letter to be redone (toned down were the exact words) and that I needed to address a few key "concerns". While I totally understood why those things needed to be addressed, I was disheartened because I knew this meant additional delays (since Christmas was just a couple days away). The creation of the second letter proved to be very difficult.
Some of the items that needed to be addressed?? Two of the children are very close in age to Jason. The oldest being exactly 8 months older and the middle girl being 11 months younger. So, we needed to explain how we would handle the issue of "twinning" - especially since this adoption would mean a change in birth order for Jason. I understand the issue and I know that we can handle the issue - I just had a very difficult time putting into words "how" we would handle it.
After a couple of days trying to focus and re-write the letter I finally forced myself the day after Christmas. I told myself that I was not going to move from the couch until I had something reasonably acceptable typed out. This time, we didn't even print & sign it. I just sent it back to the agency and asked for a review (why take the time to print & sign if I was just going to need to redo it again - most likely). So, Wednesday night the letter made it's way through the internet super highway to CAS. On Thursday, the agency responded and said that they have asked for these children to be put on hold specifically for us. They also said that they would review the letter and get back to us by the next morning. By Friday afternoon, no response (this is the part of this process that is really driving us - especially Brian - crazy - guess it's our "business" world training) so I sent a follow up message. Today I got an email saying that they have forward our letter to the ICAB. Now originally we were told the letter needed to be signed and this second letter is not signed. So - is this going to cause further delays??? Sometimes you just have to laugh at the situation.
On an interesting note, since we were informed that this sibling group was available, the 2 girls have both celebrated birthdays. One turned 13 on December 25th and the youngest turned 10 on December 29th. It is my greatest hope that these are the last birthdays that they spend away from their forever family (even if it's not us). Both days I quietly celebrated to myself - lest I get my hopes up too high - but I had to acknowledge - even if only to myself - their special day.
With 2013 right around the corner, I am hopefully that the new year will bring new hopes and re-newed excitement for the expansion of our family through this adoption process. At the same time, my heart is breaking for the children in Russia that may not have an opportunity for a forever family due to politics and other evil works. And my heart aches for those families who have been working so hard to bring a Russian child to their home. It is truly a terrible situation where there are no winners and for many children, this decision means a death sentence (the conditions there truly are terrible). God is in control and I know that He will protect, comfort and keep His children at all times. As you celebrate the new year, please keep these children and families on your prayer list. Please continue to pray for our process. Please pray for our friends the Barfields who will be leaving on Jan 7th for India to bring home their little girl Angel. Please pray for our friends the Habbicks who are waiting final court hearings for their little girl in India. Please pray for my friends the Gales & Listers as they continue to adjust & bond to their little girls from Ecuador. God is amazing and I feel so blessed to be a tiny part of all these miracles. Also, I am praying for all of you - my family & friends - for a wonderful and very blessed 2013.
For His Glory,
Christina
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