So when you are dealing with a International Adoption there are a lot of crazy rules and criteria - most of which I'm not sure I fully understand. But those countries have the kids - so they get to make the rules - I guess. Most of the criteria is not a big deal but there is one health stipulation for the Philippines that is going to be a challenge. One of their requirements is that the parents must have a BMI less than 35 - each. Brian, of course - is in good shape but I'm in real trouble. Anyone that has seen me in recent years can probably guess that I am currently not meeting that requirement. As much as it pains me to say, my BMI is sitting at 40.2. That's a lot of weight for this 5 foot, 2 inch frame. So unless I can grow 5 inches, I need to reduce my weight to at least 190. Currently that would be a 30 pound lose. Not impossible but it's not going to be easy.
So 2 1/2 weeks ago when we started this adoption journey I was weighing in at 227.6. This morning I weighed in at 220.2. So progress is being made but it is really hard. I am such an emotional eater. Food is my comfort of choice - M&M's, cookies, brownies, chips, etc. If it's junk, it's high on my list of "go to" foods. I eat when I'm bored, I eat when I'm trying to solve work problems, I eat when I need a little break from work, I eat when I get upset, I eat when I get stressed. Basically I tend to visit the kitchen a lot as evidenced by the extra 50+ pounds I have put on in just the last 5 years.
What about exercise? Work has been in a lay off mode for the past 3-4 years so I have felt like I have needed to be at my desk 24/7. I've been working on several conversions for the past 2 years that require a lot of lunch time meetings and sometimes late hours. So, when I do get a few minutes of down time - hitting the gym in our basement is just not the top of my priority list. I'm tired, I just want to veg on the couch with my comfort food. It's a terrible cycle of my own making all wrapped up in my laziness and excuses.
What can a girl like me do? I have got to change my ways or we may miss the wonderful child that God has waiting for us. That change started on 4/17 when I started keeping a journal of my food & exercise. I also started on 4/21 on Body by Vi . It's a meal replacement shake program - similar to Slim Fast and many other programs. I'm doing 2 shakes a day (breakfast & lunch) with a small dinner. I also must get back to regular exercise - making it a priority. It's not going to be easy and I really, really, really have to fight off the urge to run to the kitchen for comfort junk. There are still going to be bad days but I have to not dwell on them and just work harder.
The reward will be so worth the pain. Not only will I reduce my weight so that I can pass the BMI requirement to be able to bring home our child but I am going to get healthy for Brian & the boys. Plus I just might like myself again and gain that confidence that I lost many years ago when the pounds started to pack on . Looks like a win, win for everyone!!! The road is going to be hard and daily I will be crying out to God for his help. This is a God size task that is only going to be accomplish with God's intervention. I know that with God on my side, there is nothing that I cannot accomplish and nothing that I cannot overcome.
I guess this means we are on 2 journey's. We have our adoption journey and a weight loss journey. Soon these two paths are going to cross and after that our lives are going to be changed forever - one way or another.
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